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Show Me Character

 

Missouri 4-H Youth Development’s Character Education Program is based on CHARACTER COUNTS!

 

Introduction

 

What is Show-Me Character?

Show-Me Character is a framework that teaches young people to make sound moral judgments.  It also encourages all adults to become more involved in helping youth develop positive character traits.  Our communities benefit when youths and adults understand the importance of being involved and caring citizens and “doing the right thing” by incorporating the Six Pillars of Character in their daily lives. 

 

Six Pillars of Character

  • Trustworthiness
  • Respect
  • Responsibility
  • Fairness
  • Caring
  • Citizenship

 

A Person of Character

  • Is a good person, someone to look up to and admire
  • Knows the difference between what is right and wrong and always tries to do what is right.
  • Sets a good example
  • Makes the world a better place
  • Lives according to the “Six Pillars of Character”

 

What You Can Do

There are many things you can do to teach and encourage your child to be a person of good character.  Specifically, you can:

  • Teach your child that character counts- that their success and happiness will depend on who they are inside, and not what they have of how they look.  Tell them that people of character know the difference between right and wrong because they guide their thoughts and actions by some basic rules of living.

·       Be an advocate for character.  Don’t be neutral about the importance of character or casual about improper conduct.

  • Be a good role model.  Hold yourself to the highest standards.  Remember, everything you do and don’t do, sends a message about your values.  When you slip, act the way you want others to behave when they act improperly- be accountable, apologize sincerely and resolve to do better.
  • Praise good behavior and discourage bad behavior by imposing fair, consistent consequences that prove you are serious about character.  Show courage and firmness by enforcing the core values when it is difficult or costly to do so.

 

 

4-H Character Connections – Character Counts in Missouri 4-H

For over 100 years, 4-H has encouraged young people to show good character in all they do – to be respectful, to be responsible, to follow the rules – and they have done just that.  Character education is a top priority in all 4-H programming.  Based on the CHARACTER COUNTS! Coalition Six Pillars of Character Missouri’s 4-H families are encouraged to “Show Me Character,” not only while involved in 4-H programs, but as an essential part of daily life.

 

Ask your child(ren) to tell you about the Six Pillars of Character– trustworthiness, respect, responsibility, fairness, caring and citizenship.  The Six Pillars are the framework for the CHARACTER COUNTS! Coalition, a nonpartisan and nonsectarian alliance of hundreds of schools and youth-servicing organizations across the country. 

 

The Six Pillars and What They Mean

Trustworthiness

·          Be honest.

·          Don’t deceive, cheat or steal

·          Be reliable – do what you say you’ll do

·          Have the courage to do the right thing.

·          Build a good reputation.

·          Be loyal – stand by your family and friends

 

Respect

·          Treat others with respect

·          Be tolerant of differences

·          Use good manners, not bad language

·          Be considerate of the feelings of others

·          Don’t threaten, hit or hurt anyone

·          Deal peacefully with anger, insults and disagreements.

 

Responsibility

·          Do what you are supposed to do.

·          Persevere; keep on trying!

·          Always do your best.

·          Use self-control; be self-disciplined

·          Think before you act – consider the consequences

·          Be accountable for your choices.

 

Adapted from materials written for US Army Child and Youth Services and USDA Cooperative State Research, Education, and Extension Service.

 

Fairness

·          Play by the rules.

·          Take turns and share.

·          Be open-minded; listen to others.

·          Don’t take advantage of others.

Don’t blame others carelessly

Caring

·          Be kind,

·          Be compassionate and show you care.

·          Express gratitude.

·          Forgive others.

·          Help people in need.

 

Citizenship

·          Do your share to make your school and community better.

·          Cooperate.

·          Stay informed; vote.

·          Be a good neighbor.

·          Obey laws and rules

·          Respect authority.

·          Protect the environment.

 

Practice Character At Home

·          Give each child time, attention and affection.

·          Treat others with mutual respect.

·          Model and teach good manners.

·          Share your ethical beliefs

·          Expect and demand good character.

·          Utilize moral reasoning and good ethical decision-making.

·          Evaluate whether the TV shows, videos and movies are teaching lessons you want your children to live by.

·          Look for daily ways to encourage and reinforce behaviors demonstrating good character.

·          Develop high expectations, predetermined rules and consistently applied consequences for your child’s behavior.

·          Read to your children and keep character related literature in your home.

·          Bring up developmentally appropriate topics for discussion and ask, “What is the right thing to do?”

·          Help your child enjoy non-material rewards.

·          Discuss the meanings of holidays and the true spirit behind the special day.

·          Look for daily teachable moments.

·          Demonstrate kind acts and help people in need.

 

 

 

 

Improving Our Moral Landscape: A Plea to Parents to Promote Good Character, Mark J. Britzman, PhD., South Dakota State University, National CHARACTER COUNTS! faculty member.

 

 

4-H Character Connections – Character and Sports

The crack of the bat, the splash of the water and the swoosh of the soccer ball; all sounds of exciting sports events.  You may also hear the yelling of the coach, the jeers of the crowd and the name calling by athletes.  The news of a sporting event turned violent or athletes doing whatever it takes to win are common.  CYS works hard to make sports fun.  And, because “character does count” in CYS it is important for all of us to constantly encourage sportsmanship instead of gamesmanship. 

 

Gamesmanship means doing whatever it takes to win including encouraging athletes to bend, evade or break the rules to gain a competitive advantage.  You may have heard, “It’s only cheating if you get caught,” indicating there is no ethical reason for following the rules.  Sadly, there are many examples from professional sports that show gamesmanship – the infamous corked bat or winning the Soccer World Cup with an illegal move.

 

The good news is there are also wonderful examples of athletes who encourage sportsmanship – making the way one plays the game central.  For example the Illinois high school quarterback who asked to have his name stricken from the record book when he discovered both coaches had agreed to let him successfully pass the football for the state record. Because he did not make the passes on his own merit, he did not want the recognition.  Or Luz Long, the German athlete who shared his secret with Jesse Owens on how not to foul on the long jump line.  Owens went on to win the Gold Medal and Long the Silver in the 1936 Olympics.  Sportsmanship means giving 100% to the game with the commitment to integrity, fair play, respectfulness and grace.  

 

It is the responsibility of everyone in CYS – staff, parents and children – to encourage sportsmanship and good character.

 

A Little Summer Reading

Summer is a great time for your child to read just for fun.   Help your child pick books that emphasize character. 

 

Choices

Everyday we are faced with many decisions.  Most are relatively easy, but there are others that are more critical and take more thought.  While all choices reflect who we are, those critical decisions can really test our character.  Hard choices aren’t just reserved for adults.  Our children also are faced with difficult

decisions.  It’s our job to help them think about how to make decisions that reflect good character.  We must help them understand that making the right decision is not necessarily the popular decision.  Making the right decision can cost us in terms of friendship, prestige, pleasure or money.  Making good choices is hard work and takes courage.

 

One way to think about the choices is to ask these five questions:

  1. Is there possible danger of physical harm to you or anyone else?
  2. Could you or someone else suffer serious emotional pain?
  3. Could the decision hurt your reputation?
  4. Could the decision impede achieving any important goal?
  5. Could you or someone else suffer significant monetary or property loss?

 

Example:  A group of teens decides to remove a STOP sign from an intersection and then hide in the bushes to see what happens.  It isn’t long before they find out.  A car proceeds through the intersection, hits another car and everyone is killed.  The teens were arrested, tried and imprisoned.  OK, although this is a true story it is a pretty drastic example.  It is also easy to see that there is a “yes” response to each of the 5 questions.  Wouldn’t it have been much better had the teens thought about these questions before removing the STOP sign?

 

Help your child make good choices.  Talk to them about decisions they make in their lives.  Consider these examples:

·          Not completing and turning in a homework assignment.

·          Copying a paper directly from the Internet.

·          Encouraging friends to not use playground equipment properly – jumping off equipment, etc.

·          Encouraging your friends not to play with the new student because you decide you don’t like them.

 

 

 

Adapted from materials written for US Army Child and Youth Services and USDA Cooperative State Research, Education, and Extension Service.

 

Adapted from CHARACTER COUNTS! – Army CYS training information.  CHARACTER COUNTS! and the Six Pillars of Character are service marks of the CHARACTER COUNTS! Coalition, a project of the Josephson Institute of Ethics. www.charactercounts.org

 

 

 

Contact Information

 

Last Revised 12-Nov-07

 

University of Missouri Extension

4-H Center for Youth Development

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